Don't Shoot Shoot Shoot That Thing at Me

I know I should post here more. I guess I don't because I don't know what I'd say at this point; or rather, I have a lot to say, and I don't know exactly where to start.

Drawing class is going well. I consistently draw more slowly than my classmates, but I've come to realize that it's because of my earnest efforts to improve proportion in my drawings. Even my instructor, perhaps sensing my discomfort with how slow I am, has pointed out to me on a couple of occasions that it's good that I draw slow, making an effort to place everything correctly. I wish I could have taken the figure drawing course as well, but that's for majors only and I'm not a major yet. I can't really scan any of these pictures in, because they're on huge newsprint pads. Plus they aren't all that interesting; we've been drawing blocks, bottles, cones, etc. Nothing too exciting.

At the end of this semester, I will finally acquire an undergrad degree. It's a great relief in many ways, but it begins a new chapter in my life which is the cause of some anxiety. As far as 'what happens next', I'm feeling pretty certain that I will either move to Dallas or Austin to live for a while, depending on where I get a job first. There's a wild, impetuous part of me that wants to go directly to someplace bigger and scarier like New York or Chicago. But I don't think I'm quite ready to jump right into the water like that. In a place like Austin, I can live in a big city, a city with a large artist community, but there are also a lot of people I already know there and can crash with if necessary. Even if I had all the money necessary to go to CalArts right now, I think I would want to go out and live a little first. I don't believe I can ever be a first rate artist without having seen more of the world. Besides, I need to work up a portfolio.

On the subject of CalArts, I'm still turning over in my head whether that's the right place for me. I've looked into graduate school, but honestly I can't do a graduate art degree without doing an art undergrad degree first, regardless of which school I go to. So if I MUST get a second undergrad degree, then I want it to be some place exceptional like CalArts. On the other hand, the expense of it is weighing more and more on my mind. Going to school there would be a dream, but unless I could get some huge scholarships (or save up for 10 years) it's a pipe dream. I'm already in debt from my first undergrad degree, I don't want to take out loans for a second one. Also, thanks to This Week in Tech, I heard about an extraordinary online school called Animation Mentor.com. This appeals to me a lot, because the program gives you mentors who are working in the business for the duration of your education. Not just any animators, either; we're talking animators from Pixar, ILM, and Disney. Not only that, but it's quite inexpensive. At the very least, by the end of it you'd have several contacts within the business (your mentors).

What bothers me about it is that I've never been very good with online instruction. When it comes to 'mentors', I prefer to have a physical person I can actually go to to talk with. That's one of the things I loved about the music degree - to have a mentor who's following your progress from start to finish. I like the idea of an apprentiship learning paradigm. Furthermore, Animation Mentor.com does not provide any classes in traditional drawing, and I feel that I need them.

In any case, deciding what school I will go to is still somewhat far into the future. Ultimately, though, my desire to go to CalArts hasn't waned at all. Even with the difficulties in my way, I feel that somehow there is a way and it will present itself if I look for it.